Good thoughts are like balm to the dead. No selfish love must be sent to them, no grieving because the departed is not around any longer; this bothers the deceased and brings to them a heavy burden. The love that remains and makes no claim to still want the dead here with us, benefits the deceased and increases his or her happiness.
Source (German): Rudolf Steiner – GA 95 -Vor dem Tore der Theosophie – Stuttgart, September 2, 1906 (page 151)
Translated by Nesta Carsten-Krüger